WHAT IF THERE WERE A SIMPLE SOLUTION TO YOUR MOST PAINFUL RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS?

Answer these 4 questions and discover the #1 secret to a healthy love life!

Are you looking for a secure relationship, but find yourself trapped in toxic relationships with partners that are either emotionally unavailable, or too smothering and over-controlling?

Learning about attachment styles in adulthood, can help.

Perhaps you have acquired a lot of skills, tips, techniques or "red flags," to help you make better decisions in love, but no matter what you do, no amount of insight seems to help you break free from unhealthy patterns, or stop feeling attracted to the "wrong" kind of partner.  If this sounds familiar, you are in the right place. 

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WHO AM I?

Hi, my name is Briana MacWilliam, and I am a licensed and board certified creative arts therapist, with more than 14 years in the field, working with individuals, just like you.

Using a psycho-spiritual approach to attachment styles (which are 4 unique blueprints for how you give and receive love), I help insecure lovers go from self-doubting to self-sovereign, and calling in those soul-shaking, passionate partnerships they want, without having to talk in circles around their feelings for hours or even years on end, with no tangible result.

And I do this, using my unique service, The MacWilliam Method™.

AA 101 J

“I am astounded by Briana’s knowledge of attachment. This comes from someone (albeit a layman) who has read voraciously on the subject for 7 years, now. There is insight and detailed explanations that simply can’t be found anywhere else…She should have a cable show.  The level of clarity provided is beyond anything I’ve seen.”

 

Jim Lewandowski

WHAT ARE ATTACHMENT STYLES?

Attachment styles are 4 unique blueprints for how you've learned to give and receive love in your childhood, but also through your adult romantic relationships. Your blueprint is like a compass for how much closeness or space you desire, when it comes to emotional intimacy.

  • Individuals that want a lot of closeness with a partner, typically have anxious attachment; I call them "Open Hearts."
  • Individuals who want more space, usually have avoidant attachment; I call them "Rolling Stones."
  • Individuals that both want and fear closeness, are sometimes considered "fearful avoidant," "anxious-avoidant," or "disorganized"; I call them "Spice of Lifers."
  • Individuals who are comfortable with both closeness and separateness in relationships, and can flexibly move back and forth between those states of being, are considered securely attached; I call them "Cornerstones."
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HOW DO ATTACHMENT STYLES AFFECT US?

Your attachment style biologically influences you in 4 compelling ways:

  1. From the deepest recesses of your survival brain (your Limbic brain)...
  2. From the stimulation of your autonomic  nervous system...
  3. Through your genetic inheritance...
  4. And with a chemical cocktail of neurotransmitters that creates a euphoric attachment to inconsistent partners, similar to drug addiction. 

Brain researcher Helen Fisher calls this “frustration attraction” and likens it to a gambler at the slot machine!

But the brain has what's called “plasticity”, which means it is malleable and changeable. Your attachment style can change!

 

TO LEARN HOW ATTACHMENT STYLES AFFECT RELATIONSHIPS, WATCH THIS VIDEO.

Scroll below to learn more about the three insecure attachment styles, and hear from folks that have experienced tremendous benefits after experiencing The MacWilliam Method™, through my online courses.

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“Briana MacWilliam is the kind of teacher who gets down to the bone where the blood is hot and running. She will never point to a thing when she can show it to you… She knows when to drop the important stuff and she drops it on you form her own experiential core. She does not take you anywhere she is not willing to travel herself. She has a combination of grace and grit that make her a fantastic teacher and a fabulous clinician.”

 

Alan Pottinger

WHAT CAN BE DONE ABOUT IT?

Most people search for quick fixes or easy solutions to changing their partner's behavior, and feel frustrated when they wind up in the same old situations. But the liberating truth is the one common denominator throughout all of your relationships, is you.

And all the insight in the world is not necessarily going to make you feel any differently! Research has shown that attachment styles change; but not if you are left alone in isolation, and not if you are only talking about it!

The MacWilliam Method™

I help individuals struggling with insecure attachment go from self-doubting to  self-sovereign, and calling in the soul-shaking, passionate partnerships they want, without having to talk in circles around their feelings for years on end, with no tangible result. And my service is called The MacWilliam Method™. 

The MacWilliam Method™ (TMM) is a service that utilizes a psycho-spiritual approach to applying creative arts interventions, through the framework of attachment theory. TMM is informed by evidence-based practices in attachment and trauma research, but is rooted in creative arts interventions as the primary modality.

The directives in my online courses have been modified for experiential learning, coupled with live support and discussion in private Facebook group forums (they are not intended to replace long-term therapy, but you may learn what type of therapy would be a good fit).

TMM is composed of three principal tools to address mind, body and spirit: 1) Cognitive Reframing, 2) Body-Activation, and 3) Arts-Based Experientials.

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Cognitive Reframing

Raise conscious awareness through cognitive reframing, so you can re-write painful narratives and create an openness to receiving the love you want.

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Body Activation

With a blend of guided imagery, basic movement, and sound healing, we gently titrate all that anxious energy stored up in your body to build new neural networks in a healthier framework, using the language of the body and the unconscious.

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Arts-Based Experientials

Through creative expression we externalize the inner world, and achieve self sovereignty by being in dialogue with the Authentic Self.

Maria Sanches TAAT

"When I found Briana's courses I was struggling with an on-again off-again relationship, and starting to feel like I was going crazy. I saw myself acting in ways that shocked and embarrassed me, but at the same time my partner seemed to want to throw fuel on the fire. In my heart, I couldn't believe that everything we shared was a lie, and my partner was just some evil "narcissist." Briana's perspective made it so much clearer for me, and has given me real hope."

Maria Sanchez

HOW DO YOU KNOW IF ATTACHMENT STYLES APPLY TO YOU?

Below are some of the common struggles of individuals that may struggle with insecure attachment styles: anxious, avoidant, and disorganized. I have also included some hopeful and uplifting testimonials from folks that have taken my online courses, and experienced significant benefits, as a result!

Anxious Attachment: Are you doing all the work, and its never enough?

Checkout Kairi's story of how she found "an amazing secure man" who has become her "rock in the storm" soon after taking my courseAnxious Attachment 101: 5 Days to Take The Open Heart From Clingy to Confident!

If you've been trying hard to impress a partner but wind up walking on eggshells, because no matter what you do, it only seems to push them away, it is likely you are an anxious Open Heart. Open Hearts tend to demonstrate behaviors such as...

  • Falling into people-pleasing mode.
  • Waiting around too long for the reciprocation of loving feelings.
  • Assume the blame, because you think if you are responsible for something going wrong, it must be within your power to fix it.
  • You may have critically low self-esteem and struggle with feelings of unworthiness.
  • Deep down, you believe you have to earn love and approval, and so, you are drawn to partners that are “challenging” or “edgy,” that make you work for it.
  • On the other hand, if a partner gives you love and affection too freely, you find them “boring,” or “too nice.”
  • You think, “If they need me, they won’t leave me.” But you always question whether or not they really love you for you.
  • You struggle to know who the “real” you is.
  • You tend to get lost in the potential of the relationship, rather than the reality of it.
  • You may also struggle with forms of addiction, such as drug abuse, alcohol abuse, food addictions, shopping addictions, hoarding, gaming addictions, and so on.
  • You find yourself in partnership with someone that is emotionally unavailable, thus "proving" your deepest fear: that you are unlovable.

But there is hope! If you struggle with anxious attachment, checkout my online course today.

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Katie Melrose, 29

"I have spent a lot of time chasing after emotionally unavailable partners, but after this course, I now see what power I have to shift the way I am showing up in love. Plus, the creative exercises are fun, and the lectures are easy to listen to. Highly recommend this course."

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Michelle Giuseppe, 31

"My biggest struggle has been discerning my own intuition from a knee-jerk response to triggering statements and behaviors from emotionally unavailable partners. I found myself questioning if my feelings were even real, or if I was going crazy. The guided meditations and arts-based activities really got me back into my body and grounded me in a way that nothing else has, not even years of therapy and self help. Now, I feel a lot more in touch with my intuition and can tell when my gut is giving me an "it's okay" signal, or a "run as fast as you can" signal! I highly recommend this course."

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Marco, N., 36

"Dear Briana, just want to thank you for your amazingly clear and eye opening videos on attachment styles and spirituality. In addition to the book of Amir Levin, your (holistic and body) view on feelings and behaviour really touched me and gave me a ton of new insights and more self awareness. Thank you so much!"

Avoidant Attachment: Do you need a lot of space and independence in love?

Find out about Jordan's experience of avoidance and decoding the Rolling Stone's Lovemap, after taking my course, Avoidant Attachment 101: Decode the Rolling Stone's Lovemap in 5 Days. 

If you are sick of falling headlong into relationships, only to wind up feeling bored, smothered, trapped, or worried about hurting your partner, just when things are supposed to be getting good, it is likely you are a Rolling Stone. Most Rolling Stones demonstrate behaviors such as...

  • You are accustomed to partners demanding too much of you, so you are sensitive to even benign requests.
  • You view generosity as a form of manipulation, obligating you reciprocate more than you are comfortable giving.
  • You you anticipate being blamed for when things go wrong in a relationship.
  • You might be described as having a fear of commitment.
  • You might be considered aloof or emotionally distant, but when you do feel things, you feel them very intensely.
  • It might be hard to identify the feeling, let alone express it, and so you try your best to shut it down.
  • You may struggle with perfectionism and fears of failure, but act just the opposite so as to avoid appearing too weak or vulnerable.
  • Deep down, you believe you have to earn love and approval, and so, you are drawn to partners that are “challenging” or “edgy,” that make you work for it.
  • Tend to focus on the flaws in the relationship, and your missed opportunities.
  • If your partner flirts with someone else or expresses a need for space, you may feel a sense of relief, at first, followed by a need to test them.
  • You may also struggle with forms of addiction, such as drug abuse, alcohol abuse, food addictions, shopping addictions, hoarding, gaming addictions, and so on.
  • You tend to split your emotional life from your sexual desires.
  • You find yourself in partnership with someone that is emotionally dependent on you, thus "proving" your pessimistic perspective on love: that it comes at the cost of personal freedom.

But there is hope! If you struggle with avoidance, checkout my online course today.

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Ralph, Widdop 29

"Briana's videos are always so comprehensive and integrated. I'm so grateful for Briana's work on Anxious/Avoidant Attachment, as this construct has been my default relationship pattern through my twenties. Briana's understanding has helped me reconcile with this, and I feel as though I can make healthier partner selections in the future. Much love!"

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Irena, 35

"The course work helped me tap into my emotions, rather than just my intellectualism, which I struggle with. It also wound up helping me in other areas of my life too...I just started noticing things about myself that I hadn't known before. After years of therapy, in only 6 months it has helped tremendously."

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Mikael, G. 

"The best part for me is the arts activities. Because when I paint in daily live, I have a sense of craftsmanship about it, but In these exercises, I get another angle on it, and sense the presence of my inner child!"

Disorganized Attachment ("Fearful Avoidance"): Do you crave connection but fear it at the same time?

Learn about Joe's experience of disorganized attachment and how compassion and creativity helped him experience more positivity and felt security, after taking my online course, Disorganized Attachment 101: 5 Days to Support the Spice of Lifer in Love.

If you feel you (or your partner) may exhibit a combination of the behaviors of both the Open Heart and the Rolling Stone attachment styles, you are likely a Spice of Lifer.

Sometimes this is harder to determine because their attachment style might lean more towards anxious or avoidant, depending on their partner’s attachment style, and their contexts.

It's important to realize a Rolling Stone or Open Heart might lean in the opposing direction from time to time as well, but a Spice of Lifer experiences this in the extreme, which makes their presentation qualitatively different. Spice of Lifers tend to...

  • Behave in frightened or frightening ways  in moments of distress
  • Demonstrating unpredictable, confusing or erratic behavior, sometimes with no apparent trigger
  • They often can’t make sense of their experiences
  • If they’ve suffered abuse, they may offer unusual explanations or justifications for their abuser’s behavior
  • When they’re asked to convey details of their relationships, their stories are fragmented, and they have difficulty expressing themselves clearly.
  • They may struggle to self-soothe, and have difficulty allowing others to help them co-regulate their emotions.
  • It may be difficult for them to open up to others or to seek out help.
  • They may struggle when parenting their own children.
  • View the world as an unsafe place, and have pessimistic beliefs about the possibilities for love.
  • In conflict, they tend to vilify their partners and assume their partners have malicious intent towards them.
  • They are prone to severe black-and-white thinking, and cannot sustain ambiguous feelings for very long without taking action to find relief, which might look like acting out in various ways, including sexual infidelity, ending a relationship on a whim, or picking up an addiction, for example.
  • They tend to overgeneralize minor issues, assuming even the smallest disagreement is a sign the entire relationship is flawed and never going to work.
  • The assertion of personal boundaries is received as a criticism or a threat to the relationship security, and so they may treat their partners with hostility, or emotional withdrawal, if a partner attempts to assert their boundaries.
  • But the hardest thing for the Spice of Lifer, is that they usually attract other partners with insecure attachment styles, and so each partner is constantly feeling triggered, because for the Spice of Lifer, their attachment figures are considered a source of both comfort and threat.
  • It feels like there is no way to relax into a partnership, or regard any conflicts in the relationship as opportunities for deepening intimacy.
  • Because no healthy relationship can be sustained like this, for the  Spice of Lifer, it proves their deepest fear, which is that they are inherently helpless and unworthy, and relationships are really just a game of power dynamics; control, or be controlled.

But there is hope! If you struggle with disorganized attachment, checkout my online course today.

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Mandi Cole DIS 101

Mandi Cole, 33

"This course clarified so many things for me. Especially the emotional and body boundaries lessons. I have a history of trauma, and this felt like a very clear and creative way to address my confusion around boundaries. Thank you, Briana!"

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Nick Patten, 42

"I have seen a lot of things online that talk about "codependency" and "narcissism" but Briana breaks this down in a very clear and non judgmental way, for the laymen. The activities she offers are fun to do, and I feel like I have a stronger grasp of what my triggers are, when it comes to personal boundaries. Highly recommend this course."

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Jitka, 38 

"This course is full of information and very practical. My favorite exercise was 'The Healing Tree.' Whenever I am feeling anxious, I make one and it calms me right down. I have so many of them now!"

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WHERE TO BEGIN?

If you are ready to dive into learning about attachment styles with The MacWilliam Method™, first I want to assure you, all the things and the feels are possible for you. More than that, its even probable, once you you decide and commit to living nothing less than a next-level life, and committing to the processes that will set you on that path.

The good news is, the tools you might need are relatively simple. And the MOST crucial information that you will need on this journey, already exists INSIDE YOU.

However, learning how to access those parts of yourself can sometimes be a difficult task, when you've been taught your whole life to do the exact opposite.But that's just conditioning. And it can be undone. Just as the brain is blessed with plasticity. And it can be rewired.

Negative energy and defensive patterning that keep you stuck in a confusion cycle around attachment styles CAN be transformed and healed, so that you can RELAX into the brightest luminescence that is your spirit. It is a process which will allow you to step into a state of being on FIYAH about life, and share that brilliance with a stars-in-their-eyes lover.

If you are ready to dive in, I recommend checking out my online courses, today. You'll be so happy you did!